TransbliterationsShakespeare's Sonnets, rewritten

Part II. Knowing

The Life we had Together

Shakespeare's Sonnet XVIII → Transbliterated (041)

Shakespeare

Shall I compare thee to a summer’s day?
Thou art more lovely and more temperate:
Rough winds do shake the darling buds of May,
And summer’s lease hath all too short a date:
Sometime too hot the eye of heaven shines,
And often is his gold complexion dimm’d,
And every fair from fair sometime declines,
By chance, or nature’s changing course untrimm’d:
But thy eternal summer shall not fade,
Nor lose possession of that fair thou ow’st,
Nor shall death brag thou wander’st in his shade,
When in eternal lines to time thou grow’st,
    So long as men can breathe, or eyes can see,
    So long lives this, and this gives life to thee.

Transbliteration

How should I compare thee
	To a summer’s day?

You are drier
You are slower

The gusts of your tempests
Fell the old growth trees
	Ending things too soon

Your intense light
Cracks the gold
	That should only melt

All parades end
	The floats dismantled
		And warehoused
	The costumes changed
		For streetwear
	The music stopped
		As sounds of Nature emerge
But summer doesn't know how
	The setting sun lingers
	Memories hide in the long shadows
		Which lengthen to encompass
			The Earth
			All breathing men
			All seeing eyes
			The life that is
			The life we had together
Measured against the sonnet and its Spanish

How this poem's lines relate to Shakespeare's Sonnet XVIII and to the Google Translate Spanish it was written from. Counts are made by script, and each line's label comes from an AI judge. Sentences in italics are Claude's reading, not the poet's. How it was measured →

Some of this poem's lines are worked examples in the judge's rubric, so they were labeled in advance.

From the English
  • Restated
  • Inverted
  • Transbliterated
  • Original
From the Spanish
  • Faithful
  • Noise
  • Untouched

The poem opens with the sonnet's question and walks its images in order, but turns the beloved into the storm and the heat, and ends where the sonnet refuses to, with lengthening shadows and a shared life that is over. The Spanish gave it the parade and fair from ferias, the music from rumbo, and tempests from tempestuosos.

The sonnet
The beloved is lovelier and milder than a summer's day, and unlike summer's fading beauty will never fade, because these lines will keep the beloved alive as long as people live to read them.
Argument kept
1 of 4
Feeling
the beloved +2 → the beloved −1 (reversed)
Spoken to
the beloved → the beloved
Translation
adequacy 2.5 · fluency 1.4 · chrF 56. The opening question, the summer images and the couplet come through recognisably, but the third quatrain's promise of eternity in verse is garbled. Untranslated verbs and broken agreement run through the middle.
Judge
medium confidence · free-standing

lift 0.22 aligned 50% (chance 11%) order 0.78 verbatim 9% Spanish look-alikes 4% (chance 3%)left in English 2%

Sonnet XVIII, with its Spanish

  1. S1Shall I compare thee to a summer's day? Voy a compararte con un día de verano? adequacy 4 · fluency 3 · grammar
  2. S2Thou art more lovely and more temperate: Tú eres más hermosa y más templado: adequacy 4 · fluency 2 · grammar
  3. S3Rough winds do shake the darling buds of May, vientos tempestuosos Tiembla el brote de mayo, adequacy 2 · fluency 1 · grammar · omission
  4. S4And summer's lease hath all too short a date: Y el verano de arrendamiento tiene todo demasiado breve una fecha: adequacy 2 · fluency 1 · grammar · archaic misread
  5. S5Sometime too hot the eye of heaven shines, En algún momento muy caliente brilla el ojo del cielo, adequacy 3 · fluency 3 · wrong sense
  6. S6And often is his gold complexion dimm'd, Y a menudo es su tez de oro dimm'd; adequacy 2 · fluency 1 · untranslated · grammar
  7. S7And every fair from fair sometime declines, Y todas las ferias de belleza alguna vez declina, adequacy 1 · fluency 1 · wrong sense · grammar
  8. S8By chance, or nature's changing course untrimm'd: Por casualidad o cambiar de rumbo de la naturaleza untrimm'd; adequacy 2 · fluency 1 · untranslated · grammar
  9. S9But thy eternal summer shall not fade, Pero el verano tu eterno no se desvanecen adequacy 3 · fluency 1 · grammar
  10. S10Nor lose possession of that fair thou ow'st, Tampoco pierde la posesión de ese owest eres hermoso; adequacy 2 · fluency 1 · untranslated · wrong sense · grammar
  11. S11Nor shall death brag thou wander'st in his shade, Tampoco se aplicará a la Muerte jactarse wander'st tú en su sombra, adequacy 2 · fluency 1 · wrong sense · untranslated · grammar
  12. S12When in eternal lines to time thou grow'st, growest cuando en eternas líneas en cuando tú: adequacy 1 · fluency 0 · untranslated · omission · grammar
  13. S13So long as men can breathe, or eyes can see, Mientras los hombres respiren o los ojos puede ver, adequacy 4 · fluency 2 · grammar
  14. S14So long lives this, and this gives life to thee. Mientras, vive esto y esto da vida a ti. adequacy 3 · fluency 2 · omission · grammar

Transbliteration

  1. P1How should I compare thee S1 · verbatim
  2. P2To a summer's day? S1 · verbatim
  3. P3You are drier S2 · transformed — comparative frame kept, qualities replaced
  4. P4You are slower S2 · transformed — comparative frame kept, qualities replaced
  5. P5The gusts of your tempests S3 · spanish-echo · via cognate «vientos tempestuosos» — the winds now belong to the beloved
  6. P6Fell the old growth trees S3 · inverted — young buds become old growth
  7. P7Ending things too soon S4 · modernized
  8. P8Your intense light S5 · transformed
  9. P9Cracks the gold S6 · transformed
  10. P10That should only melt S5 · transformed
  11. P11All parades end S7 · spanish-echo · via mistranslation «todas las ferias» — fair (beauty) came back as ferias, fairs
  12. P12The floats dismantled S8 · spanish-echo · via untranslated «untrimm'd»
  13. P13And warehoused no source · original
  14. P14The costumes changed S8 · transformed
  15. P15For streetwear no source · original
  16. P16The music stopped T8 · spanish-echo · via sound «rumbo» — rumbo (course) heard as rumba
  17. P17As sounds of Nature emerge S8 · transformed
  18. P18But summer doesn't know how S9 · transformed — summer itself, not the beloved's, cannot end
  19. P19The setting sun lingers S9 · transformed
  20. P20Memories hide in the long shadows S11 · inverted
  21. P21Which lengthen to encompass S12 · spanish-echo · via untranslated «growest»
  22. P22The Earth no source · original
  23. P23All breathing men S13 · transformed
  24. P24All seeing eyes S13 · transformed
  25. P25The life that is S14 · transformed
  26. P26The life we had together S14 · inverted — living on becomes a life that is past

Inversions

  • otherS3 → P6darker “the darling buds of May” “Fell the old growth trees”
  • permanence-decayS11 → P20darker “Nor shall death brag thou wander'st in his shade” “Memories hide in the long shadows”
  • permanence-decayS14 → P26darker “this gives life to thee” “The life we had together”

Through the Spanish

  • cognateT3 → P5 «vientos tempestuosos» “The gusts of your tempests”
  • mistranslationT7 → P11 «todas las ferias» “All parades end”
  • untranslatedT8 → P12 «untrimm'd» “The floats dismantled”
  • soundT8 → P16 «rumbo» “The music stopped”
  • untranslatedT12 → P21 «growest» “Which lengthen to encompass”

Where the translation failed

  • T12 “When in eternal lines to time thou grow'st” → «growest cuando en eternas líneas en cuando tú» The claim that verse grafts the youth onto time, which the couplet depends on, is unreadable.
  • T7 “And every fair from fair sometime declines” → «Y todas las ferias de belleza alguna vez declina» Beautiful things become fairs, so the general law of fading beauty is lost.
  • T10 “Nor lose possession of that fair thou ow'st” → «Tampoco pierde la posesión de ese owest eres hermoso» The beauty the youth owns is left as an English verb and a stray adjective.

See it in the garden →

Hear it read, and watch it become

The reading again, but the sculptures themselves are morphing — each one melting into the next, and arriving whole on the last word of the lines it answers.

The poem, line by line

How should I compare thee
	To a summer’s day?
You are drier
You are slower
Sculpture for: How should I compare thee / To a summer’s day? / You are drier / You are slower
How this image was made
Triggering line
How should I compare thee To a summer’s day? You are drier You are slower
Seed
255387789 · 4 steps
Run
20250528045552_255387789
CLIP the short prompt T5 the long prompt
Art period diagram Neo-Expressionism
Material land art polychromed wood
Adjectives geometry amazing, awe-inspiring, defies logic, authentic, apocalyptic, inscrutably
Background grand vistas wide green lawn
Time of day mid-day summer day
Adverbs sweet reminder of the richness of life, in the aftermath heart-wrenching sight of lost souls, radiant scene, fluid substances, somber scene, complex manifold
Image qualities Formornorpical, sharp features playful composition, fine grain capture, unreal engine, splotches spreading
Shape sculpture garden sculpture garden 
The gusts of your tempests
Fell the old growth trees
	Ending things too soon

Written, not yet carved.

Your intense light
Cracks the gold
	That should only melt
Sculpture for: Your intense light / Cracks the gold / That should only melt
How this image was made
Triggering line
Your intense light Cracks the gold That should only melt
Seed
255387789 · 4 steps
Run
20250528045552_255387789
CLIP the short prompt T5 the long prompt
Art period diagram Neo-Expressionism
Material land art polychromed wood
Adjectives geometry amazing, awe-inspiring, defies logic, authentic, apocalyptic, inscrutably
Background grand vistas wide green lawn
Time of day mid-day summer day
Adverbs sweet reminder of the richness of life, in the aftermath heart-wrenching sight of lost souls, radiant scene, fluid substances, somber scene, complex manifold
Image qualities Formornorpical, sharp features playful composition, fine grain capture, unreal engine, splotches spreading
Shape sculpture garden sculpture garden 
All parades end
	The floats dismantled
		And warehoused

Written, not yet carved.

	The costumes changed
		For streetwear
Sculpture for: The costumes changed / For streetwear
How this image was made
Triggering line
The stylized parades costumes changed For streetwear
Seed
255387789 · 4 steps
Run
20250528045552_255387789
Drift
  • substantive prompt adds "stylized parades"
CLIP the short prompt T5 the long prompt
Art period diagram Neo-Expressionism
Material land art polychromed wood
Adjectives geometry amazing, awe-inspiring, defies logic, authentic, apocalyptic, inscrutably
Background grand vistas wide green lawn
Time of day mid-day summer day
Adverbs sweet reminder of the richness of life, in the aftermath heart-wrenching sight of lost souls, radiant scene, fluid substances, somber scene, complex manifold
Image qualities Formornorpical, sharp features playful composition, fine grain capture, unreal engine, splotches spreading
Shape sculpture garden sculpture garden 
	The music stopped
		As sounds of Nature emerge
Sculpture for: The music stopped / As sounds of Nature emerge
How this image was made
Triggering line
The stylized parades music stopped As sounds of Nature emerge
Seed
255387789 · 4 steps
Run
20250528045552_255387789
Drift
  • substantive prompt adds "stylized parades"
CLIP the short prompt T5 the long prompt
Art period diagram Neo-Expressionism
Material land art polychromed wood
Adjectives geometry amazing, awe-inspiring, defies logic, authentic, apocalyptic, inscrutably
Background grand vistas wide green lawn
Time of day mid-day summer day
Adverbs sweet reminder of the richness of life, in the aftermath heart-wrenching sight of lost souls, radiant scene, fluid substances, somber scene, complex manifold
Image qualities Formornorpical, sharp features playful composition, fine grain capture, unreal engine, splotches spreading
Shape sculpture garden sculpture garden 
But summer doesn't know how
	The setting sun lingers
Sculpture for: But summer doesn't know how / The setting sun lingers
How this image was made
Triggering line
But summer doesn't know how The setting emblematic sun lingers
Seed
255387789 · 4 steps
Run
20250528045552_255387789
Drift
  • symbolizing prompt adds "emblematic"
CLIP the short prompt T5 the long prompt
Art period diagram Neo-Expressionism
Material land art polychromed wood
Adjectives geometry amazing, awe-inspiring, defies logic, authentic, apocalyptic, inscrutably
Background grand vistas wide green lawn
Time of day mid-day summer day
Adverbs sweet reminder of the richness of life, in the aftermath heart-wrenching sight of lost souls, radiant scene, fluid substances, somber scene, complex manifold
Image qualities Formornorpical, sharp features playful composition, fine grain capture, unreal engine, splotches spreading
Shape sculpture garden sculpture garden 
	Memories hide in the long shadows
Sculpture for: Memories hide in the long shadows
How this image was made
Triggering line
Memories hide In the long shadows
Seed
255387789 · 4 steps
Run
20250528045552_255387789
CLIP the short prompt T5 the long prompt
Art period diagram Neo-Expressionism
Material land art polychromed wood
Adjectives geometry amazing, awe-inspiring, defies logic, authentic, apocalyptic, inscrutably
Background grand vistas wide green lawn
Time of day mid-day summer day
Adverbs sweet reminder of the richness of life, in the aftermath heart-wrenching sight of lost souls, radiant scene, fluid substances, somber scene, complex manifold
Image qualities Formornorpical, sharp features playful composition, fine grain capture, unreal engine, splotches spreading
Shape sculpture garden sculpture garden 
		Which lengthen to encompass
			The Earth

Written, not yet carved.

			All breathing men
Sculpture for: All breathing men
How this image was made
Triggering line
shadows lengthen to encompass All breathing emblematic men
Seed
255387789 · 4 steps
Run
20250528045552_255387789
Drift
  • anchor prompt adds "shadows lengthen to encompass"
  • symbolizing prompt adds "emblematic"
CLIP the short prompt T5 the long prompt
Art period diagram Neo-Expressionism
Material land art polychromed wood
Adjectives geometry amazing, awe-inspiring, defies logic, authentic, apocalyptic, inscrutably
Background grand vistas wide green lawn
Time of day mid-day summer day
Adverbs sweet reminder of the richness of life, in the aftermath heart-wrenching sight of lost souls, radiant scene, fluid substances, somber scene, complex manifold
Image qualities Formornorpical, sharp features playful composition, fine grain capture, unreal engine, splotches spreading
Shape sculpture garden sculpture garden 
			All seeing eyes
Sculpture for: All seeing eyes
How this image was made
Triggering line
shadows lengthen to encompass All seeing implied eyes
Seed
255387789 · 4 steps
Run
20250528045552_255387789
Drift
  • anchor prompt adds "shadows lengthen to encompass"
  • symbolizing prompt adds "implied"
CLIP the short prompt T5 the long prompt
Art period diagram Neo-Expressionism
Material land art polychromed wood
Adjectives geometry amazing, awe-inspiring, defies logic, authentic, apocalyptic, inscrutably
Background grand vistas wide green lawn
Time of day mid-day summer day
Adverbs sweet reminder of the richness of life, in the aftermath heart-wrenching sight of lost souls, radiant scene, fluid substances, somber scene, complex manifold
Image qualities Formornorpical, sharp features playful composition, fine grain capture, unreal engine, splotches spreading
Shape sculpture garden sculpture garden 
			The life that is

Written, not yet carved.

			The life we had together
Sculpture for: The life we had together
How this image was made
Triggering line
shadows lengthen to encompass The life we had together
Seed
255387789 · 4 steps
Run
20250528045552_255387789
Drift
  • anchor prompt adds "shadows lengthen to encompass"
CLIP the short prompt T5 the long prompt
Art period diagram Neo-Expressionism
Material land art polychromed wood
Adjectives geometry amazing, awe-inspiring, defies logic, authentic, apocalyptic, inscrutably
Background grand vistas wide green lawn
Time of day mid-day summer day
Adverbs sweet reminder of the richness of life, in the aftermath heart-wrenching sight of lost souls, radiant scene, fluid substances, somber scene, complex manifold
Image qualities Formornorpical, sharp features playful composition, fine grain capture, unreal engine, splotches spreading
Shape sculpture garden sculpture garden

Sculptures

From line 1: “How should I compare thee To a summer’s day? You are drier You are slower”
From line 3: “Your intense light Cracks the gold That should only melt”
From line 5: “The stylized parades costumes changed For streetwear”
From line 6: “The stylized parades music stopped As sounds of Nature emerge”
From line 7: “But summer doesn't know how The setting emblematic sun lingers”
From line 8: “Memories hide In the long shadows”
From line 10: “shadows lengthen to encompass All breathing emblematic men”
From line 11: “shadows lengthen to encompass All seeing implied eyes”
From line 13: “shadows lengthen to encompass The life we had together”